Hey hey! Welcome back to The Bullpen Sessions! I want to start off with a few questions.
Are your actions determined by what other people think? Do you struggle with a sense of low self-worth or self-doubt? Do you measure your success by the amount of money you have?
If you answered “yes” to any of those questions, know that you aren’t alone. I’ve definitely been there. But today, I’ve got a very special guest that’s going to change the way you think about self-worth and success!
I’m incredibly excited to have Christina Lecuyer on the show! Christina and I discuss how to detach your sense of self-worth from external things, like success, money, and relationships. Christina struggled heavily with being addicted to external validation from others, and her journey to shift her mindset to happiness and gratitude will inspire you!
In this interview, we’re covering Christina’s golfing career, the importance of finding validation in yourself, being grateful for what you have, and unlocking your full potential. I’m so excited that you’re joining me today because you’re going to learn a lot from this conversation!
Who Is Christina Lecuyer?
Hailing from Edmonton, Alberta, Christina Lecuyer is a former professional golfer, reality television competitor, executive coach, motivational speaker, and founder of the Women with C.L.A.S.S. Mastermind. She was also a four-time All-American athlete!
Despite her success on the golf course, Christina actually began playing at a relatively late age. As a teenager, Christina worked on a golf course at a private country club. She took up golf at the age of 18 because she wanted to play with her co-workers at the golf club. She immediately excelled at the sport and began playing in tournaments. She won the Ladies Open Championship in the year 2000, and she received a golfing scholarship from the University of Central Arkansas. Shortly after graduating university, she became a professional golfer.
After her golfing career concluded, Christina began inspiring others through life coaching. She helps individuals find the life that they love and coaches them into success. You’re gonna learn a ton from Christina, so let’s get started!
Don’t Seek Validation through External Success
Christina and I kicked off our interview by discussing her golfing career and how her success actually became a hindrance to her happiness. Once she began excelling in golf at 18, Christina felt a continuous need for external validation.
“The spotlight was on me. … I needed the external validation. It was like a drug to me that I started taking when I was 18 years old, and I could not live without that drug. It was, ‘How much better can I get? How much skinnier can I get? How much better looking can I get? How much more successful can I get? How much more money can I make?’ Because everyone gave me validation based on those external things, and I became an addict to it.” – Christina Lecuyer
Christina became obsessed with her success and external image. She no longer even enjoyed playing golf but stayed with it for the other approval of others.
“I really didn’t want to play professional golf for a living. … In hindsight, it’s crystal clear. But in the moment when you’re experiencing it, everyone is telling you, ‘Oh my God, your life is amazing. This is the best thing that ever happened to you. … Why would you want to do anything different [than] playing golf for a living? You’re so lucky.'” – Christina Lecuyer
Contrary to popular belief, playing professional sports is a tough life to lead. People always assume that if you’re a professional, you’re making a lot of money and living in luxury, but that’s not at all the case for most people. The travel expenses often exceed the amount of money you’re actually making from the sport, especially in golf. Only the top athletes that are signed with several sponsors can earn good money.
Christina was miserable while playing golf. She worked tirelessly on the sport and her image, but despite her hard work, she struggled with her self-worth:
“I struggled with an eating disorder. I struggled with self-worth throughout all of it because I believed I was only worthy of what I was performing in that moment. … I just believed [that] even if I was working so hard, if I wasn’t getting the results, I didn’t believe I was good enough. I didn’t believe I was worthy. I didn’t believe people would like me. I didn’t believe I had a purpose unless I was getting those results. … It was like, ‘I’m never good enough.'” – Christina Lecuyer
Have you ever found yourself relying on the validation of others to feel happy? Maybe you care too much about how you’re perceived physically, or maybe you’re only wanting to achieve success to impress other people. Seeking external validation can cause so much dissatisfaction and pain. It drains the passion from your life. It’s essential to find validation in yourself rather than rely on the validation of others! So how do we do that? Let’s go back to Christina’s story…
Finding Validation in Yourself
Christina continued being addicted to external validation until she was 28. She realized that she had hit rock bottom and wasn’t living the life she wanted.
“I had just … failed getting my tour card for the third year in the row. … I’d probably made myself throw up 30 times that week, if not more. And I remember just looking out the window and thinking, ‘How in the world did I get here?’… I’ve always known deep within myself that I would be successful. But yet at that moment, it was just a moment of like, ‘This was SO not the plan.'” – Christina Lecuyer
Christina realized that she was living an incredibly unhappy life because of her addiction to external validation. She began observing others around her who seemed genuinely happy.
“There [were] people in life who were actually happy that had way less than me. So how the hell were they happy? And if they can do it, perhaps I can do it. … One of my best friends … I remember him just being genuinely happy, but he had a faith about him that I didn’t really have, but he was always into reading books about self-development.” – Christina Lecuyer
Christina began enveloping herself in self-help books, podcasts, and YouTube videos. She then started going to events, getting involved in masterminds, and hiring coaches. She turned her life around and shifted her mindset to find validation in herself rather than rely on the approval of others. Christina became much happier when she stopped relying on external validation.
Guys, don’t put your happiness and validation into something that’s outside of your control. Focus on shifting your mindset to be satisfied in yourself.
Christina also shifted her mindset to view life as happening for her, regardless of her circumstances:
“COVID [is a] perfect example. I have taken COVID and crushed it in COVID because I believe it’s happening for me. Like, I believe every single thing, hard and not hard, … is happening for me.” – Christina Lecuyer
Christina realized that she can turn any situation into something beneficial. Even though COVID-19 made it so that she couldn’t have her mastermind meet in person, she was able to pivot and turn the limitations of COVID-19 into something beneficial. She hosted a virtual mastermind so people all over the world could join, and she wouldn’t have been able to do that if the mastermind had met in person.
How can you turn difficult circumstances to benefit yourself and others? Maybe you can begin hosting your own business ventures remotely. Maybe you can use video conferences to reach more people. Turn difficult situations to your advantage rather than let them prohibit your growth!
Being Grateful Every Day and Unlock Your Potential
Christina and I discussed the importance of practicing gratitude every day. Finding gratitude is one of the key ways to love your life:
“My life is pretty freaking amazing, but I concentrate on how amazing my life is. I find more amazingness in my life because that’s what I’m concentrating on. I know people who have so much more than me that bitch about their life 24/7. You’ve got to find the happiness in the now, [and] you’ve got to be grateful for the now.” – Christina Lecuyer
You can have all of the money in the world, but if you don’t practice gratitude, you still won’t be happy. Focus on finding the things in your life that you’re grateful for, and celebrate those things. You won’t find happiness in money, fitness, success, or relationships if you don’t practice gratitude for the things you have.
External success doesn’t guarantee happiness. You need to be grateful for your life right now, regardless of your external circumstances. You may think that you’ll be happier if you have more success or money, but if you’re not finding the joy and gratitude in your life right now, money isn’t going to change that.
A helpful way to remember to stay grateful and joyful every day is by getting a coach or participating in a mastermind group. Both coaching and masterminds are also essential tools for unlocking your full potential and accomplishing whatever you want to achieve. Christina discussed how coaching is mainly about keeping people accountable and motivated.
“I have clients who are very successful that need [a] bouncing board. My thought process on coaching is, ‘It’s already in you.’ My job is to keep you so motivated, so consistent, and so accountable to doing the thing that you actually want to do in this world.” – Christina Lecuyer
Christina believes that everyone is meant to do great things, and we can tap into our greatness through coaching and masterminds:
“I believe every single human being has a massive purpose, and it’s your responsibility to live that out, but I think most people are inherently lazy. … Most of us are not even living up to a fraction of what we can be accomplishing in this world. … We need people holding us accountable to doing that.” – Christina Lecuyer
Are you living up to your full potential? Maybe you’re having difficulty expanding your business or getting your finances in order. You are capable of doing INCREDIBLE things, and if you are having difficulty tapping into your potential, a mastermind or coach may be the answer for you. If you’re interested in joining a mastermind, I highly encourage you to check out Christina’s Women with C.L.A.S.S. Mastermind and my Complete Game Mastermind to help you excel in your business and life!
Why You Should Listen to This Christina Lecuyer Podcast Episode Right Now…
Guys, Christina Lecuyer has so much great advice that you can learn from! We covered a lot of great material, so make sure to check out the full episode here! I also highly recommend that you check out her website and follow her on Instagram @bechristina to hear more of her wisdom!
Thank you so much for taking the time to read this Friday Bullpen Session post. Guys, I’d appreciate it so much if you’d head over to Apple Podcasts, subscribe, and give me a five-star rating. If you have a family member, friend, or co-worker that needs to stop relying on external validation, share this episode with them, and tag me @andy_neary and Christina @bechristina with a screenshot of the episode and your greatest takeaways!
Also, don’t forget to join my FREE text community! Just text the word “Mindset” to (414)-622-1462, and I’ll give you access to a TON of free weekly coaching. If you’re not quite ready to take the plunge and join the Complete Game Mastermind, this text community is a great way to see if my coaching might be right for you.
Guys, it is so essential that your self-worth isn’t rooted in external success or results. Don’t rely on the validation of others. Find joy, gratitude, and happiness in your life today, regardless of your external circumstances!
See you next time!