Here we are. The Holidays.
A time for relaxing, enjoying loved ones, and reflecting on the year. It’s not only the end of 2019, it’s the end of a decade.
Go back to the version of you that existed in 2010. Where were you? What were you doing? Who were you??
When I look back at Andy Neary in 2010, I see a COMPLETELY different person than I do today.
The 2010 version of Andy sucked. I hated my job. I was surrounding myself with the wrong crowd. I was immersing myself into hobbies (like Ironman triathlon) to mask the unhappiness in my life. Yeah, I was pretty much a wreck.
The guy you know today is much different than the one that existed 9 years ago. It’s been a long journey of mental development, connecting with good people, and taking action.
Even though I’m in a much better place today, there are still more improvements to be made. There are still days I catch myself falling back into my former mindset. One filled with self-doubt, pessimism, and fear. There are days I still catch myself worrying about what could go wrong instead of how great things already are…half-glass empty instead of half-glass full.
But, what I’ve learned throughout this journey is that my battles (and yours) are a part of life. Not every day is going to be filled with rainbows and unicorns (though I wish unicorns were a part of daily life!). Some days you will suck. However, the victories come about in recognizing your weaknesses and stopping them before they wreak havoc on your future success.
So, as we sit here just days before a new decade, I wanted to share 3 mindset shifts I will make to ensure the 2020s are the greatest decade of my life. If you find yourself sitting with the same feelings, I hope my thoughts can help you break out next year in a big way!
Work is a PART of your life. It is not you ENTIRE life.
Yeah, I got caught in this trap this year. Adding a coaching component to my business in 2019 opened the door to some bad habits … like working ALL THE TIME. When a part of your business relies 100% on your actions, it’s easy to feel like you have to be “on” all the time.
However, this mindset created a gap between Amy (girlfriend) and I as my lack of attention to my personal responsibilities left her feeling disillusioned and unsupported.
Looking ahead, my work is going to be a part of my life, not my entire life. Yes, running a business requires hard work and long hours, no doubt. But, you CANNOT stay “married” to your career if your personal life is taking a hit. There is no such thing as work-life balance, but there is work-life integration. If you find yourself working a bit too much these days, commit yourself to being “on” when you need to so you can enjoy success in your career, but turning it “off” so you can enjoy success in your personal life.
I’m going to make failure my friend.
You ever find yourself paralyzed by the fear of failure? Are you afraid to take action because you think you might look stupid? Do you feel like you have to be perfect ALL THE TIME? That was me in 2010.
I couldn’t stand the thought of losing. I wouldn’t try new things if I couldn’t be the best. I was always SO DAMN concerned with what others might think or say if I screwed up.
Me now? Hell no.
Bring on failure. If you’re not failing, you’re not trying. Some of the greatest names in history were some of the biggest “failures” in history.
Thomas Edison had over 10,000 failed attempts at inventing the light bulb before he hit pay-dirt. Michael Jordan has missed more shots than anyone in NBA history. Brett Favre has thrown more interceptions than any Quarterback in NFL history…and by a wide margin!!
Yet, failure never stopped them from getting back up time and time again. It’s time for you and I to do the same.
It’s in failure where breakthroughs occur. One slight tweak, one slight change in perspective can be all you need to unlock your greatness.
If you’re like me, you’re going to use the next decade to run towards failure, put your arm around it, and make it your friend!
Let go and know that everything is where it’s supposed to be.
There was one thing I loved about pitching more than anything…control. When I had the ball in my hand, I literally controlled the flow of the game. The game could not advance unless I threw the next pitch. It was my control of the strike zone that allowed me to have a successful baseball career. Yet, it’s control that has had a negative impact in my business career.
I want to control everything. If I don’t have the ball in my hand, anxiety takes over. Yet this desire for control has led to past failures with partnerships, employers, and financial goals.
In the next decade, I am going to let go. I am going to have comfort in knowing that everything is where it’s supposed to be. The universe always has a funny way of giving you exactly what you need when you need it. It’s about abundance, not lack. It’s about freedom, not being prisoner in your own mental jail cell.
There is absolute freedom in living life this way. Trust me, I’m still a HUGE work in progress in this category but things are going to change in the 2020s. If it’s meant to be it will be.
If you find yourself constantly grasping for control, let go. Life becomes a much more exciting and enjoyable journey when you stop trying to determine every outcome.
So, what mindset shifts are you going to make to ensure your next decade is the best you’ve ever had?
Take a moment and share them in the comments below. I appreciate you and everything you’ve done to influence who I was in 2019!
Happy New Year!